A farmer buys several pigs, hoping to breed them for ham, bacon, After several weeks, he notices that none of?
the pigs are getting pregnant, and calls a vet for help. The vet tells the farmer that he should try artificial insemination. The farmer doesn’t have the slightest idea what this means but, not wanting to display his ignorance, only asks the vet how he will know when the pigs are pregnant.
The vet tells him that they will stop standing around and will, instead, lay down and wallow in the mud when they are pregnant.
The farmer hangs up and gives it some thought. He comes to the conclusion that artificial insemination means he has to impregnate the pigs. So, he loads the pigs into his truck, drives them out into the woods, has sex with them all, brings them back and goes to bed.
The next morning, he wakes and looks out at the pigs. Seeing that they are all still standing around, he concludes that the first try didn’t take, and loads them in the truck again. He drives them out to the woods, bangs the pigs twice for good measure.
The next morning, he wakes to find the pigs still just standing around. "One more try," he tells himself, and proceeds to load them up and drive them out to the woods. He spends all day shagging the pigs, and upon returning home, falls listlessly into bed.
The next morning, he cannot even raise himself from the bed to look at the pigs. He asks his wife to look out and tell him if the pigs are laying in the mud.
"No," she says, "they’re all in the truck and one of them is honking the horn!"
10 Responses
babigurl_417
09 Feb 2010
me not Conan
09 Feb 2010
loooooooooooong but not bad
Jerome A
09 Feb 2010
oh my stars that is so cool.
Tiger Tanaka
09 Feb 2010
did they squeal?
vaivagabundo
09 Feb 2010
Heehee!
Maybe they were male pigs!
mexican dude
09 Feb 2010
lol he got used to it so much they loved it lol
Iritadragon
09 Feb 2010
I laughed so hard at the punch line, I almost choked. VERY good one!
darkflower366
09 Feb 2010
Hahaha soo good!
Bagbalm Catdew
09 Feb 2010
Those pig farmers have all the fun!!
Thanks for the Great joke!!!
DE
Blondie
09 Feb 2010
Thats nasty but funny.

That’s funny! Ewww! Star!
~Candice~